Enhancing self-confidence in children to build a strong personality
“My child is very shy and afraid of trying anything new and getting close to his relatives and friends.. What should I do?” Certainly, there are many children who suffer from a lack of self-confidence that makes them move away from the participation of others and from integration, and they always wait for someone else to follow, but is it possible to strengthen Children’s self-confidence And develop it into a child with a strong personality? Follow us.
Signs of lack of self-confidence in children
Now you must first determine if your child is really suffering from this problem with several signs that may appear on him telling you that he needs help, as follows:
- The child avoids any challenging activity or task without even trying because of his fear of failure.
- The child surrenders and gets frustrated quickly as soon as he starts a task or game because he feels the inevitability of losing it.
- The child lies or cheats as soon as he feels that he will lose the game or the competition or because of his poor performance in it.
- He behaves like infants in a very silly way, which makes his peers mock him, which worsens his condition.
- Blaming others or making fake excuses and minimizing important events.
- Poor academic performance and boredom with the activities he used to practice.
- His isolation from family gatherings and his distance from friends due to his poor social skills.
- Mood changes that affect him, such as anger, sadness, or frustration and calmness.
- Commenting negatively on himself and criticizing his looks, clothes, and everything he does.
- He always has difficulty facing criticism or even accepting reward.
- His excessive sensitivity to any comment or opinion of him.
- His influence and imitation of negative behaviors that he sees in his peers who are stronger than him, such as learning to curse, beat, neglect lessons, and disrespect others, and sometimes reach adolescents to experience smoking and drugs.
Reasons for lack of self-confidence in children
There are several reasons why a child loses his self-confidence and self-respect. In fact, parents may have most of these reasons:
comparison with others
It is natural for the child to compare himself with others such as his brothers, colleagues and relatives, and he may compare what he owns and what others have in terms of tools and toys, as well as the comparison between the living and material conditions.
Increase pressure for better performance
Here comes the blame on the parents and teachers in the school who unconsciously put the child under nervous pressure to improve his performance and increase his results, whether in studies or in sports activities, and compare him with his colleagues. Losing with his friends and brothers.
Feeling of inadequacy
Some children have a sense of inferiority and that they do not have sufficient competence no matter how hard they try, although this is not a condition for lack of self-confidence in children. The problem occurs when this activity is completely within the child’s interest, but he cannot perform it satisfactorily.
Constant criticism and rejection from others
Especially from adults whose opinion the child is interested in, such as a parent, some older siblings, some teachers, or a sports coach.
Overprotection from parents
Parents’ excessive fear and constant anxiety over the child from trying anything or doing anything on his own builds a weak personality for the child and makes him believe that he is incapable and weak in his potential, whether mental or physical. Parents can also transmit anxiety disorders that they suffer from to their child, so he grows up with it and continues to feel fear and mistrust. .
Enhancing self-confidence in children
In fact, there are several ways to boost your child’s self-confidence so that he becomes a strong personality when he grows up and can rely on himself, and according to what your child faces and makes his self-confidence shake, there are several ways to restore confidence to the child:
- Always praise him for his good behavior and performance, even if it is not satisfactory, but you know that he made the effort, and assure him that you trust his abilities and that he can reach a better result.
- Give your child the opportunity to enter competitions and challenges, even if they are small and within the limits of the family first, make him make some decisions and take the opportunity to develop his leadership skills.
- Talk to him about the differences between people and that “there is no one better than another” but “there is one person different from another” and every human being certainly has something that distinguishes him.
- Watch TV with him or surf the Internet, discuss with him, always ask him for his opinion, and let him explore his interests himself.
- Children can build self-confidence by encouraging them to choose a higher ideal, and it is better for the ideal to be more than one person to develop their skills and acquire the qualities they aspire to in these persons.
- Crying is never a shame, especially for male children who grow up in a culture of “boys and men don’t cry!” They should know that sadness and expressing it with tears is not something to be ashamed of, even if it is only in front of his parents.
- Encourage your child to express his feelings freely and be understood by you.
- Encourage your child to find good friends of both sexes and do activities with them.
- Develop in your child the spirit of empathy with others and that he takes into consideration how other people feel when dealing with them.
- If your child imitates bad behavior as a reaction to his lack of self-confidence, never allow such an act as swearing and humiliation in the home and set clear rules for this from a young age.
- Ask a child behavior specialist about games that promote self-confidence for children or activities that teach children self-confidence that you can follow or participate in.
Many people believe that the problem of self-confidence in children is more specific to females than to males, but the matter is equal between them, especially with the current openness and the emergence of a culture of comparison that children adopt unconsciously and they may take this matter from their parents, and we must emphasize the need to consult a specialist or doctor who specializes in Psychological problems and behaviors in children if you cannot solve your child’s problem.