“My child always quarrels with his classmates and brothers and can hit them for no reason. What should I do with him?” This complaint is very frequent among mothers and fathers, and they cannot always deal with their child in a correct manner, and they often meet the aggressiveness of their child by beating or severe reprimand.. But is this the solution? Learn about the attributes in this article aggressive child And how to deal with him and modify his behavior in a proper way.

Characteristics of an aggressive child

Before you know how to deal with violence and aggression in your child’s personality, you must first make sure that he has this characteristic. An aggressive child shows some behaviors and characteristics that indicate this characteristic as follows:

• Bullying his peers at school or in the family, whether verbal or physical.
• Calling his peers unacceptable names with the aim of ridicule.
• Spreading rumors about anyone, even those close to him.
• Physical violence and assault by hitting or kicking.
• Frequent nervous outbursts for no reason.
• Ignoring some people in dealing and talking.
• Argument and discussion on any topic, even if it is simple.
• Always get involved in quarrels.
• Threat of physical harm to himself or others.

Causes of an aggressive child

Aggressive behavior in a child can be a sign of another psychological problem that the child faces and does not declare it or can only express it by showing violence and aggression. In fact, there are several reasons for this behavior as follows:

Psychological and mental illnesses

Mood disturbances

Children with mood disorders, such as bipolar disorder They lose control of themselves and become impulsive in bouts of madness that afflict them, and they sometimes perform aggressive behaviors and actions without awareness.

psychotic illnesses

For example, children with schizophrenia always have a state of doubt and distrust in all matters. This doubt motivates them internally to practice aggressive behavior as a state of reaction and self-defense because of their fear and insecurity.

frustration

Children who suffer from the inability to communicate normally and express what they want or do not want with words, and they develop aggressive and violent behavior because of their inability to deal with the frustration and anxiety they feel, and this appears more in children with autism.

Rush

Especially in the case of children with ADHD, these children do things that they don’t really realize the consequences of because they don’t think properly.

The aggressive child and environmental conditions

Aggressive behavior may develop in children and adolescents Post-traumatic stress disorder Because of certain situations or events they go through that put them under psychological and nervous pressure, but this state of aggression may be temporary and non-permanent and does not recur frequently and often ends with trauma.

Also, the child may become aggressive due to environmental conditions outside the family and family environment, because of what he is exposed to or what he encounters at school or with his classmates, or because of what he watches on television and violent electronic games, all of which have a role in shaping your child’s behavior.

Membership problems

It may happen that the child develops aggressive behavior due to a physical injury that may have affected his mental state, such as damage to the frontal lobe of the brain, or because of a certain type of epilepsy. In this case, there is no logical explanation for the aggressive state that the child is going through.

How to deal with and treat an aggressive child

There are some strategies that you must follow carefully with your child to rid him of his aggressive behavior and deal with him at the time of anger in a proper way that does not lead to worsening his problem, as follows:

Stay calm and don’t take it personally

The first thing you must do with your child is to meet his aggression with complete calm on your part, you must control your feelings and control them, as you yell at your child and abuse him will make his aggression worse.

It is very easy for your child’s behavior to make you feel guilty, blame yourself, and consider your child’s aggression as a form of anger at you, but your child certainly does not think the same way you do, so try to exclude your beliefs and feelings when facing your child’s aggression.

Don’t give up

When the aggressive child insists on his opinion and starts arguing, debating, and trying to get what he wants by following aggressive and violent behavior, never give in to him and make him see that he will not be able to get what he wants in this way.

be realistic

Try to be realistic in your expectations about following the instructions you set for your child. Some children do not pay much attention to what you say. When you stop them from doing something, they may not pay attention at the time or they may get distracted quickly. Young children do not respond quickly to verbal instructions and it takes time for them to realize what was said. Therefore, they find it difficult to adapt to changes and any new instructions. Be clear and simple and do not put too many complexities in front of him so that he does not get frustrated and explode in aggressive behavior.

Reward his positive behavior

You must encourage your child’s good behavior, even if it is very simple, such as eating well or doing his homework, and you must choose an appropriate reward for him. It is better not to choose a material reward such as money or games, but rather a moral reward.

Encourage him to express his feelings

You must teach your child from an early age to express his feelings by their well-known names such as anger, sadness, love and happiness. Expressing feelings by their names reduces your child’s frustration and will certainly avoid aggressive behavior because of that.

Finally, you yourself must learn to express your feelings in any situation you go through, as your child certainly watches you, learns from you and imitates you, and you must consult a doctor in the event that you encounter a psychological problem in order to learn how to control it so that this does not reflect on your child and develop into the problem of an aggressive child who faces his problems with the same method.